Thoughts on God

I suppose I wouldn’t believe If I wasn’t in circumstances I far from willed own my own accord

It’s His will not mine. Though I never expected to be made an example of.

Far from the plight of Jesus Christ I am merely another victim of governmental oversight

Or grievous human rights violations , false incarcerations and an attempt in my life. So it goes for liabilities like me. Those who can prove the government at fair for some major No Nos

That took my choices health freedom and nearly my life

And they still try

If I choose not to surrender to his will and take back my own. To believe I am a victim to which this Has been done, I will be consumed by my anger. Always want to be the way that I was as opposed to the way that I should be. The anger at just having found out due to recent ER MRI, that my then 32 brain atrophied to that of an 80 year old alongside the grave and likely possibility that I have MS. I have every prainey symptoms and will know for certain when I see the neurologist the 22nd

I am scared all the time unless I live in the moment

Maybe that is the gift I’ve been given by beckmung disabled which render me unable to escape myself into ego as everyone does, all the time.